IF YOU HAVE FLU, FEVER, or any other influenza symptoms, go DOCTOR,.


And FOR NOW, STAY AWAY FROM PIGS & FLU PEOPLE.



STAY THE HELL AWAY

Sad post for now.

Confused over how should I be attractive. Everyone arounds me, tries so hard to get that perfect look for something called "Confidence."

When I catch myself reading 60 articles of self-help stuff, I start to laugh. Oh ,why can we just play at that playground again?

I get so much more mixed messages from people who tries to help. I just want to believe I look & feel good, and that I can proceed on accomplishing dreams.

Then, there are people who pretend they feel good. Pretending till you make it might just be the answer for me.

Everyone's so crazy about personality, looks, finding the right one. Even the ones who do look good wants to look better.

Physical physical physical.

I feel so emotionally neglected. Should I dare to express my need for someone else? Defenses of my heart will start building up and I will stand in a white room, cold and dead.

I just want to cuddle up with someone I could trust and love. Cause after a while, I start believing no one wants me.

Haha! I guess I am stuck with the past. It's okay lah, I will smile tomorrow~ It's going to be the future soon, so I am going to keep on singing my heart away.

Wow! Amazing day today!! So happy AGAIN. LOL.

I am trying hard to be happy. Cause every now and then, its so easy to just slip over one banana and cry over the wound. And right now, I am very tempted to write about non-happy stuff.

I shall call that stupid idiot, banana. FUCKING BANANA.

Okay, happy liao!

1.
I watched KNOWING today! So cool! The special effects were incredibly superb, the sound effects, everything was epic! The way the people died make me want to run out of my seat and just shut my eyes so I won't see those images. And omygoodness, the story makes me want to cry a little bit. It's not easy to make me cry, but they almost did it. The sudden shock of tragedies happening are well-timed. I highly recommend you to watch it! Worth your SIX DOLLARS/NINE DOLLARS!

2.
I came to school today to make new friends! Totally cannot hear lecturer and was too embarassed to ask him again, since he teach a lot. Since many of my classmates were playing facebook, I got the hint and start asking around about their facebook! AWESOMENESS. All play restaurant city, some just start only. Exciting NEW FRIENDS = NEW INGREDIENTS. Wah lao, I so bad seh! HAHA! Besides, they were super nice to make friends. Some I don't dare, cause they are too quiet or tightly bound in their own clique. But hey that quiet group is small, so I don't give a shit, for wnow. :P

3.
Hang out with Dave, Phoebe and Gan Joo after schooL! Ethel and her Happy Pill went off first~ Happy love love ah! Had fun teasing her. Hanging out with DavePhoebe made me laugh like mad. Phoebe is like super high today seh! She make funny faces and many more~ I wish she would everyday be that high! Dave is as always, annoyingly hilarious! They should totally make their own tour tv, recording their antics wherever they go. They have some hilarious stuff going on, and I was lucky enough to be there to enjoy it with them~

DAVE BULLY PHOEBE = ENTERTAINMENT. :P


Gan Joo is still his nice good mode, so he haven't warm up yet. I help him a warm up a bit to the new classmates.

It's okay Gan Joo, soon you will like girls too. You know you can't resist them. HAHAHAHAHA!

4. Tomorrow is a Thursday! The whole day I shall see where I can play! :P:P


5. I have more friends in FaceBook now! WHEEE! Cool seh.


Okay, I cannot think of any more happier things. Keep reading for more tomorrow! :P:P

There is hope for a happy Siti Aisyah. :)

I shall from now on blog only happy things! :D

Okay, first happy thing. Wang Ting told me that he actually wants to hear more of my dirty jokes. First time someone truly appreciates my talent. He said long time never hear already. LOL. Feels like a comedian now. :P Hey, after years of being outcast because of that, it does make me happy!

Second, my new classmates are pretty talented. Some are pretty hardworking too! Respect. And some got pretty close to me, one of the gals~ Thank you for being nice!

Thirdly, I made Ethel laugh! Because I kena caught eating in computer lab, I made a joke out of it. Seriously, I am sitting near a door where staff can just catch me, and I still eat. Omg. I felt a bad feeling while eating, but I just like ignore it. Then when the door opened, and I turned to see a staff, I'm like "Oh. No wonder."

Fourthly, Shin Puay and Puay Ling, the Puay Puay's! as I like to call them, are able to switch class to my class! AWESOME!!More friends to play with!

Fifthly, Dave tried to cheer me up, unknowingly, by saying I am going to the wrong class, when I know I am going to the correct one. At that moment, I was caught off guard, and I blurt out " I going somewhere else." I go buy a drink, and think for a moment, "What is the class number?" Took me quite a while. LOL. I just came out of the room, and I can just forget it like that. Knss... Then it dawned on me. "CORRECT WHAT?! It is 2037! Aiyoooh"

Sixthly, saw K__vin looking at a female image so openly. LOL. He was trying to log off but it was too slow, so everyone just look at his computer. XDDD

Seventhly, I remembered the teacher showing some female 3D model which was nude. The guys were like "Ohwoahh.. Got colour somemore! Very real seh. Horny le." WAH. So fast?! I thought need at least 5 seconds? I found out it only took 1 second. I am learning something new everyday huh? :P

Eightly, I had a longer conversation. Truly happy for the first time.

Ninethly, I was able to control from blasting at everyone. I realized I was PMS-ing already, and I quickly find some alone time to stabilize myself. Whew. A lot of friendships saved.

Tenthly, no TC training! Went home early ahh!!

Eleventhly, I am thankful at least one asked me "What's wrong" when I left. Thank you Cheeryl, I feel so touched.

Twelvely, I plan to draw the eyes of someone. :PPP You should know who you are.

Thirteenthly, Ethel proved to me the way I think was abnormal. My thinking was too pessimistic, that my heart totally skip some beats when I measured it. It was that bad. I now believe, if there is a desire, there IS a chance. At all times.

Fourtheenthly, a really nice stranger who is a girl, went up to me and say " Your bag never zip!" Then she proceed to help me zip up my bag. Awww.. so sweet man! I kept saying thank you. Haish. All the other aunties and uncles and other pple just don't care seh.. I should have seen what uniform she had. Then I can praise her more. :D


Thank you for reading lovelies, and I shall see you tomorrow!

It's a new semester, new friends. New memories to be made, sweat to be lost, tears gone and love to be found.

I'll lay my head in patience. I'll seek the gold in every storm.

& I will keep my eyes clear, clear and clear.

OMG. I swear with my life, that Deborra Lee Furness is one woman I truly respect.

Wow. She is the love of Hugh Jackman!

FUCKING SWELL!
Omygoodness.

I swear so badly that I am so effing happy, and SO FREAKING JEALOUS! At the same time! Sorry that I am a bit slow, but I just realised that Hugh is married. Omg. How could THAT EVER PASSED FROM ME?!

He is like THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE! Ohgod. Okay, I shall calm down.

Not only is it because Hugh is like my sweetheart/eye-candy/x-men fav/etc for years already.. but their love is really beautiful!! He pancakes for his children and sings love songs to Deborra !! They go to filming sets together! And he made it a point to introduce to her all his female co-workers!!

TELL ME. WHICH FUCKING GUY WOULD EVER DO THAT? Hugh Jackman does!

Most guys I know is just fucking assholes. Sorry, but its true.
And despite the Hollywood limelight, they are like 12 years in marriage!!

I SO HAPPY FOR THEM!!!

OhMyFreakingHell. That kind of love, I only know exist in dreams.

I WANT THEIR LOVE TO BE MY LOVE LIFE. OMG. OMG.

MAY YOU GUYS BE HAPPY FOREVER!

Maybe I can be friends with their children~~ :D

Something about some people just don't seem right. They are happy at the time, very hyped up, cheery and cheery, cheeks oh so rosy but something feels diff about them. I don't feel their happiness. It feels very hollow.

Yet, when I am around those who are pretty much calm, only smiling but not laughing, they seem to radiate much more happiness than the the so-called hyper ones. I feel much more filled up around them.

I don't know. My feelings have grown stronger. I can actually feel if people are truly happy or not. I don't know how. But I can. I can sense the off-ness of the jokes, the hugs and guffaws.

I can feel it last time, now I can sense it twice more sensitively.

I know now better than to pretend to be happy. I'd rather be calm, and truly contented, then being so wild, yet missing something important.

:)

My age maybe 17. But I think I am more of a 40 year old. It's tiring to pretend to be immature most of the time, just to get along. If I act my mental age, my true self, I think it's hard to connect with others.

Altho I do keep those who are of the same mental age as me, very very close to me.

And NO. I do not mean 40 year old, as being too realist, or pessimistic, or just plain bitter. NO. That's not mature. I mean those who are full of hope, doesn't deny the reality but still strive to achieve the best, realistically and without doubts. Never gave up on things they believed in because they know in the end, that is all they have.

LOL. Me now backs to 17!

Muahhx!

Things to think about.

If you were abused by your loved one, would you stay with him/her? Would you?

Yeah, if you were not abused before, you would be like. "OF COURSE I WOULD LEAVE HIM/HER".

But seriously, this person, you so deeply loved, who have been with you for so many years, abused you.. is it so easy to walk away?

Why do some of us willing to stay with the abuser?

Especially those who grow up with parents who abused them.

Is it because of survival, because of the powerful intimate connection even though of a sick level, or what?


I don't know. I hope if I were to be abused..*CHOY*.. I would have the strength to not deny the truth, seek help and walk away.

Pictures going to be posted real soon!

WOW! Just got back from Sentosa yesterday!! With my drama peeps!

I swam in the sea!! Wooooot. Got a lot of fishes attracted to my leg. I also do not know why. And then one whole group of us drama people, keep singing random lines~

We even caught a starfish!! Sucked on my palm. :P But of course, released it back safely into the water.

HAHA! (Sing this in My Heart Goes On chorus tune!)

One day I went to the bar,
and I saw a blue cow,
which blocked my view,
went to the door,
and farted
one more time.
and another time,
and another time..


Well, instead of watching the sunrise, we watched the sunset..
Omygod, its like orange cream that glows!!

It was like watching God photoshopping the whole sky into some orange-blue-white milkshake!! So pretty! And saw those helicopter Apache so near to us! Of course, being crazy, we waved while screaming " Army man are hot!!"

HAHA!

Ate a lot of donuts, macaronni and other stuff. The others tried not to get drunk. LOL. Anyway, no one get drunk, and first time I had a picnic with a hilarious bunch of people. Some chased each other for no reason, others keep dunking into the water and checking out babes (while getting bitten by small fishes..) , another tried to bribe me 50 dollars to drink a beer.. (BLOODY HELL) and we just kept singing and singing~

Bonded with a lot of people! My family, friends of my drama~ So awesome.

IF YOU HAVE FLU, FEVER, or any other influenza symptoms, go DOCTOR,.


And FOR NOW, STAY AWAY FROM PIGS & FLU PEOPLE.



STAY THE HELL AWAY

Sad post for now.

Confused over how should I be attractive. Everyone arounds me, tries so hard to get that perfect look for something called "Confidence."

When I catch myself reading 60 articles of self-help stuff, I start to laugh. Oh ,why can we just play at that playground again?

I get so much more mixed messages from people who tries to help. I just want to believe I look & feel good, and that I can proceed on accomplishing dreams.

Then, there are people who pretend they feel good. Pretending till you make it might just be the answer for me.

Everyone's so crazy about personality, looks, finding the right one. Even the ones who do look good wants to look better.

Physical physical physical.

I feel so emotionally neglected. Should I dare to express my need for someone else? Defenses of my heart will start building up and I will stand in a white room, cold and dead.

I just want to cuddle up with someone I could trust and love. Cause after a while, I start believing no one wants me.

Haha! I guess I am stuck with the past. It's okay lah, I will smile tomorrow~ It's going to be the future soon, so I am going to keep on singing my heart away.

Wow! Amazing day today!! So happy AGAIN. LOL.

I am trying hard to be happy. Cause every now and then, its so easy to just slip over one banana and cry over the wound. And right now, I am very tempted to write about non-happy stuff.

I shall call that stupid idiot, banana. FUCKING BANANA.

Okay, happy liao!

1.
I watched KNOWING today! So cool! The special effects were incredibly superb, the sound effects, everything was epic! The way the people died make me want to run out of my seat and just shut my eyes so I won't see those images. And omygoodness, the story makes me want to cry a little bit. It's not easy to make me cry, but they almost did it. The sudden shock of tragedies happening are well-timed. I highly recommend you to watch it! Worth your SIX DOLLARS/NINE DOLLARS!

2.
I came to school today to make new friends! Totally cannot hear lecturer and was too embarassed to ask him again, since he teach a lot. Since many of my classmates were playing facebook, I got the hint and start asking around about their facebook! AWESOMENESS. All play restaurant city, some just start only. Exciting NEW FRIENDS = NEW INGREDIENTS. Wah lao, I so bad seh! HAHA! Besides, they were super nice to make friends. Some I don't dare, cause they are too quiet or tightly bound in their own clique. But hey that quiet group is small, so I don't give a shit, for wnow. :P

3.
Hang out with Dave, Phoebe and Gan Joo after schooL! Ethel and her Happy Pill went off first~ Happy love love ah! Had fun teasing her. Hanging out with DavePhoebe made me laugh like mad. Phoebe is like super high today seh! She make funny faces and many more~ I wish she would everyday be that high! Dave is as always, annoyingly hilarious! They should totally make their own tour tv, recording their antics wherever they go. They have some hilarious stuff going on, and I was lucky enough to be there to enjoy it with them~

DAVE BULLY PHOEBE = ENTERTAINMENT. :P


Gan Joo is still his nice good mode, so he haven't warm up yet. I help him a warm up a bit to the new classmates.

It's okay Gan Joo, soon you will like girls too. You know you can't resist them. HAHAHAHAHA!

4. Tomorrow is a Thursday! The whole day I shall see where I can play! :P:P


5. I have more friends in FaceBook now! WHEEE! Cool seh.


Okay, I cannot think of any more happier things. Keep reading for more tomorrow! :P:P

There is hope for a happy Siti Aisyah. :)

I shall from now on blog only happy things! :D

Okay, first happy thing. Wang Ting told me that he actually wants to hear more of my dirty jokes. First time someone truly appreciates my talent. He said long time never hear already. LOL. Feels like a comedian now. :P Hey, after years of being outcast because of that, it does make me happy!

Second, my new classmates are pretty talented. Some are pretty hardworking too! Respect. And some got pretty close to me, one of the gals~ Thank you for being nice!

Thirdly, I made Ethel laugh! Because I kena caught eating in computer lab, I made a joke out of it. Seriously, I am sitting near a door where staff can just catch me, and I still eat. Omg. I felt a bad feeling while eating, but I just like ignore it. Then when the door opened, and I turned to see a staff, I'm like "Oh. No wonder."

Fourthly, Shin Puay and Puay Ling, the Puay Puay's! as I like to call them, are able to switch class to my class! AWESOME!!More friends to play with!

Fifthly, Dave tried to cheer me up, unknowingly, by saying I am going to the wrong class, when I know I am going to the correct one. At that moment, I was caught off guard, and I blurt out " I going somewhere else." I go buy a drink, and think for a moment, "What is the class number?" Took me quite a while. LOL. I just came out of the room, and I can just forget it like that. Knss... Then it dawned on me. "CORRECT WHAT?! It is 2037! Aiyoooh"

Sixthly, saw K__vin looking at a female image so openly. LOL. He was trying to log off but it was too slow, so everyone just look at his computer. XDDD

Seventhly, I remembered the teacher showing some female 3D model which was nude. The guys were like "Ohwoahh.. Got colour somemore! Very real seh. Horny le." WAH. So fast?! I thought need at least 5 seconds? I found out it only took 1 second. I am learning something new everyday huh? :P

Eightly, I had a longer conversation. Truly happy for the first time.

Ninethly, I was able to control from blasting at everyone. I realized I was PMS-ing already, and I quickly find some alone time to stabilize myself. Whew. A lot of friendships saved.

Tenthly, no TC training! Went home early ahh!!

Eleventhly, I am thankful at least one asked me "What's wrong" when I left. Thank you Cheeryl, I feel so touched.

Twelvely, I plan to draw the eyes of someone. :PPP You should know who you are.

Thirteenthly, Ethel proved to me the way I think was abnormal. My thinking was too pessimistic, that my heart totally skip some beats when I measured it. It was that bad. I now believe, if there is a desire, there IS a chance. At all times.

Fourtheenthly, a really nice stranger who is a girl, went up to me and say " Your bag never zip!" Then she proceed to help me zip up my bag. Awww.. so sweet man! I kept saying thank you. Haish. All the other aunties and uncles and other pple just don't care seh.. I should have seen what uniform she had. Then I can praise her more. :D


Thank you for reading lovelies, and I shall see you tomorrow!

It's a new semester, new friends. New memories to be made, sweat to be lost, tears gone and love to be found.

I'll lay my head in patience. I'll seek the gold in every storm.

& I will keep my eyes clear, clear and clear.

OMG. I swear with my life, that Deborra Lee Furness is one woman I truly respect.

Wow. She is the love of Hugh Jackman!

FUCKING SWELL!
Omygoodness.

I swear so badly that I am so effing happy, and SO FREAKING JEALOUS! At the same time! Sorry that I am a bit slow, but I just realised that Hugh is married. Omg. How could THAT EVER PASSED FROM ME?!

He is like THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE! Ohgod. Okay, I shall calm down.

Not only is it because Hugh is like my sweetheart/eye-candy/x-men fav/etc for years already.. but their love is really beautiful!! He pancakes for his children and sings love songs to Deborra !! They go to filming sets together! And he made it a point to introduce to her all his female co-workers!!

TELL ME. WHICH FUCKING GUY WOULD EVER DO THAT? Hugh Jackman does!

Most guys I know is just fucking assholes. Sorry, but its true.
And despite the Hollywood limelight, they are like 12 years in marriage!!

I SO HAPPY FOR THEM!!!

OhMyFreakingHell. That kind of love, I only know exist in dreams.

I WANT THEIR LOVE TO BE MY LOVE LIFE. OMG. OMG.

MAY YOU GUYS BE HAPPY FOREVER!

Maybe I can be friends with their children~~ :D

Something about some people just don't seem right. They are happy at the time, very hyped up, cheery and cheery, cheeks oh so rosy but something feels diff about them. I don't feel their happiness. It feels very hollow.

Yet, when I am around those who are pretty much calm, only smiling but not laughing, they seem to radiate much more happiness than the the so-called hyper ones. I feel much more filled up around them.

I don't know. My feelings have grown stronger. I can actually feel if people are truly happy or not. I don't know how. But I can. I can sense the off-ness of the jokes, the hugs and guffaws.

I can feel it last time, now I can sense it twice more sensitively.

I know now better than to pretend to be happy. I'd rather be calm, and truly contented, then being so wild, yet missing something important.

:)

My age maybe 17. But I think I am more of a 40 year old. It's tiring to pretend to be immature most of the time, just to get along. If I act my mental age, my true self, I think it's hard to connect with others.

Altho I do keep those who are of the same mental age as me, very very close to me.

And NO. I do not mean 40 year old, as being too realist, or pessimistic, or just plain bitter. NO. That's not mature. I mean those who are full of hope, doesn't deny the reality but still strive to achieve the best, realistically and without doubts. Never gave up on things they believed in because they know in the end, that is all they have.

LOL. Me now backs to 17!

Muahhx!

Things to think about.

If you were abused by your loved one, would you stay with him/her? Would you?

Yeah, if you were not abused before, you would be like. "OF COURSE I WOULD LEAVE HIM/HER".

But seriously, this person, you so deeply loved, who have been with you for so many years, abused you.. is it so easy to walk away?

Why do some of us willing to stay with the abuser?

Especially those who grow up with parents who abused them.

Is it because of survival, because of the powerful intimate connection even though of a sick level, or what?


I don't know. I hope if I were to be abused..*CHOY*.. I would have the strength to not deny the truth, seek help and walk away.

Pictures going to be posted real soon!

WOW! Just got back from Sentosa yesterday!! With my drama peeps!

I swam in the sea!! Wooooot. Got a lot of fishes attracted to my leg. I also do not know why. And then one whole group of us drama people, keep singing random lines~

We even caught a starfish!! Sucked on my palm. :P But of course, released it back safely into the water.

HAHA! (Sing this in My Heart Goes On chorus tune!)

One day I went to the bar,
and I saw a blue cow,
which blocked my view,
went to the door,
and farted
one more time.
and another time,
and another time..


Well, instead of watching the sunrise, we watched the sunset..
Omygod, its like orange cream that glows!!

It was like watching God photoshopping the whole sky into some orange-blue-white milkshake!! So pretty! And saw those helicopter Apache so near to us! Of course, being crazy, we waved while screaming " Army man are hot!!"

HAHA!

Ate a lot of donuts, macaronni and other stuff. The others tried not to get drunk. LOL. Anyway, no one get drunk, and first time I had a picnic with a hilarious bunch of people. Some chased each other for no reason, others keep dunking into the water and checking out babes (while getting bitten by small fishes..) , another tried to bribe me 50 dollars to drink a beer.. (BLOODY HELL) and we just kept singing and singing~

Bonded with a lot of people! My family, friends of my drama~ So awesome.